Got FAT (shit!) - time to fix!

[ryl515]

I weigh the most I have ever weighed in my life. Xtreme Gainer was not meant to be taken by me. Apparently my metabolism and ability to never be fat no matter what I do/eat has changed now that I am 23 instead of 17. One cheat day turned into three BIG cheat days when my parents came to take me out to eat for my birthday and decided to leave half a cake, two bags of cookies, and a whole container of ice cream before they left. Time to get to work. Keeping track on Microsoft Excel sheet. Excuse the fact that I didn't eat much or that often -- shit gets busy monday-thursday with my schedule being:
1.) wake up
2.) rec for lifting and cardio
3.) class
4.) rec for lifting and cardio
5.) sleep

As you can see from the attached excel spread, I am currently 210 lbs and only 5'9''. I do have a good amount of muscle, but my belly I have developed over winter break is bothering me. Shit's gonna get real bros!

[ryl515]

Oh, fyi -- Back workout went like this:

-wide grip lat pulldowns
-underhand medium grip pulldowns (like chin-ups but with cable)
-low overhand row machine
-palms facing in pulldown machine
-rear delt flyes
-palms facing in row machine

All were done 12 x 10 x 8 x 30 -- weight was increased as reps decreased, then weight was dropped in half and repped for 30.

Didn't do lower back extensions today because I was already sore down there because I broke my back when I was 19 and it gets fucked up every now and then.

[toasted1]

Good luck bro


wap

[The Unit]

Is this why that girl at the rec rejected you?

[tapout]

While I admire your willingness to work out, and hard, you diet is fucked all to shit. You will lose weight at that low of a deficit, however, you will be skinny-fat. :fyi:

At that level of intensity, you need to be eating at least 3000 cals a day. Minimum. If you wanna eat in such a small window, research Leangains.

http://www.leangains.com/ It works. Gotta go to work. will update later.

[The Unit]

While I admire your willingness to work out, and hard, you diet is fucked all to shit. You will lose weight at that low of a deficit, however, you will be skinny-fat. :fyi:

At that level of intensity, you need to be eating at least 3000 cals a day. Minimum. If you wanna eat in such a small window, research Leangains.

http://www.leangains.com/ It works. Gotta go to work. will update later.

God has spoken, or atleast a hardened repo man....

[Captain Ahab]

Dude.

Go here:

http://www.calorieking.com/interactive-tools/weight-maintenance-calories-calculator/

Figure out your maintenance calories.

Eat 500 or 600 below that.

Keep protein around 1g/1lb bodyweight.

Eat a little more fat, let the carbs fall where they may.

Skip the double weight lifting sessions.

Do cardio 3x times a week starting up (up it later on as weight becomes harder to lose).

Aim for 1.5lbs-2lb loss per week. Anything more and you risk losing muscle (if you do in fact have muscle under that at).





Follow the above, thank me in 12 weeks.

[Captain Ahab]

oh yeah. I lol'd @ fap session included.

For some reason when I am seriously cutting I don't fap much at all. Must fuck with my test levels or some shit.

[ryl515]

Excuse the fact that I didn't eat much or that often -- shit gets busy monday-thursday with my schedule being:

I didn't purposely eat so little. I had to do a lot of reading for class. Shit gets book/article reading intensive now that I am only taking my core classes since graduation is nearing. My bad. dun goofd


oh yeah. I lol'd @ fap session included.

For some reason when I am seriously cutting I don't fap much at all. Must fuck with my test levels or some shit.

I am actually finishing a bottle of tribulus right now so maybe that is helping?

[ryl515]

(if you do in fact have muscle under that at)


I'm about to do the Ethiopian thing and just take tehroidz when I'm down to ~100lbs

And I DO have muscle underneath. I warm up with your max, cunt.

[Hagabro]

story needs pics

[Spider Monkey]

For some reason when I am seriously cutting I don't fap much at all. Must fuck with my test levels or some shit.
That's because when you cut, you lose weight and we all know you're attracted to fatties.

[ryl515]

story needs pics

Will attempt to take pics in the mirror with my sisters camera possibly Friday since I don't have class? Will consider posting a picture of sister as well. Can't do it today because I have to read until class and then my mommy is picking me up (loldui) to take me home for a doctors appointment tomorrow morning.

[Captain Ahab]

Dude, you fucking trip me out.

lol @ posting pics of sister
lol @ mommy picking you up to take you to doctor

[ryl515]

Well I knew everyone would request it. Just stayin' ahead of the game bro

[toasted1]

Why don't you post pics of your mom and play doctor with your sister instead?


wap

[darthvibrator]

Is this why that girl at the rec rejected you?

.

[ryl515]

Probably why she left me hangin, yes. I was at home yesterday and today so I was not able to read food labels due to nice homemade beef stew for dinner and chicken for lunch today. Stew included peas, corn, carrots, beef, and potato, so it wasn't too far off diet standards. Chicken was a few pieces, sweet potato, and broccoli, which isn't bad. I'm heading out to class in a few minutes then hittin the rec afterwards. Microsoft Excel and possible photos tomorrow (if I'm not playing NCAA Football 2012 all day... which actually kinda sucks, but I got a Kent State dynasty going and I'm trying to make them a force to be reckoned with)

[Z-28]

can I bang your sister?

[Captain Ahab]

I get first dibs, amirite?

[Z-28]

nouRnotrite. I called it, therefore you get sloppy seconds.

[ryl515]

Picked up a scale at walmart today so I can weigh myself right when I wake up all naked and stuff. I was having to use the scales at the rec while wearing all my clothes and my shoes.

One cheat day turned into my birthday weekend which turned into a week of cheating like a fucking idiot. Started to get back on track yesterday but wasn't monitoring stuff closely. Today was the first time I counted calories and shit to record. Real pumped for my scale and my mom putting $400 on my credit card which led to a walmart school essentials and food pantry update. Records are attached again.



"Peaks" in my cardio section is a name I gave to simplify the act that had no name. I walk one lap -> jog one lap -> run one lap -> jog one lap -> walk one lap. I did two sets of those. I should quit smoking lawl. Also, the chicken/rice/cheese/salsa wrap is made with a whole wheat wrap, grilled chicken, whole grain brown rice, fat free cheese, and regular mild salsa. Was DELICIOUS! I forgot what else I was gonna say (if anything).

[J31Bro]

Yeah fuck working out and monitoring what you eat. I'm fine being a miserable unhealthy puke. Thanks.

[SAD]

... I am currently 210 lbs and only 5'9''...

I am 5'8". The most I have ever weighed was 223. But that was only briefly while I picked up my chocolate lab to lift her into the truck.

[ryl515]

I am 5'8". The most I have ever weighed was 223. But that was only briefly while I picked up my chocolate lab to lift her into the truck.

After my first weigh-in where I am naked and not filled with water, I am officially 203 lbs. It has a digital display so I do it three times and take the average just in case... but all three came to 203 lbs (made math easy).


EDIT: justsawwutudidtherelol

[ryl515]

Feelin' real good today. Did the circuit all the way through without getting bored and stopping, hah.

The circuit is:
leg press
seated calf raises
chest press
leg extensions
lower back extension
shoulder press
seated hamstring curls
lat pulldown
chest flyes
rear delt flyes
machine back rows
triceps extension
bicep curls machine

Each station is 45 seconds with a 20 second transition. Stationary bikes are between each station and also count for a "45 second station", so it takes a little bit of time to get through all of it. Feels good when you're done though.

2000m on the row machine was awesome with random "sprints" included. I normally do 100m "sprint" followed by 100m "cool down", but today I was doing a sprint for 300-400m at a time. My cool downs were much shorter and surprisingly more intense than usual. I don't know what got into me but I hope it continues.

Calories appear to be up ~400, which is fine since they were really low yesterday. Also, the increase in calories apparently came mostly from protein and some carbs. Healthy carbs, that is; no insulin spikes here brah.

Running extremely low on tribulus and Oxydrene which is kinda making me sad. My container of White Flood is almost gone, so I hope my order is processed and shipped soon. Pretty sure I ended up deciding to give Mass-Pump XXL (or whatever the fuck it was called) a whirl. Also on deck is the Fat Obliteration stack from prohormoneforum.com -- DS Lean Xtreme and OxyElite Pro; both 90 capsules. If I wrap up my bi-weekly meetings with my "alcoholic-retard-counselor" before the FO stack is done, I'm probably gonna dip into some H-Drol, M-Drol, or P-Mag. Gotta cheat to look comparable to DH when we bang chicks together.

[Porch Monkey]

http://img580.imageshack.us/img580/6449/foody.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/580/foody.jpg/)

[SAD]

haha!

[ryl515]

My day was sub par in all aspects of my fitness/diet routine. I wasn't able to eat enough or as often as I would have liked because my Monday/Wednesday class schedule is ghey. I did high, medium, and low cable crossovers for chest in the morning with the intention on doing some presses during my second round at night. I was really feeling the elliptical today but, of course, there are only two available since the others are "temporarily unavailable"... and you bet your ass two hot chicks were on them. I wasn't able to stick around to wait for one to open up or even do anything else because I had to read for my 3:45pm class.

Upon my return to the rec after my last class, I was greeted with what seemed like the entire student body that decided to go to the rec. I wasn't able to do any chest presses because a fat, mean lookin' cunt was on the one in the circuit room and douchebags in wifebeaters were sitting on the other one and randomly doing 1/4 of a rep of the whole stack in an attempt to impress hot cunts that go by. I was so pissed that there were so many god damn people, most of them being wifebeater douchers and sleeveless-t fags, I almost grabbed my jacket and took off. Since I was already there and had used 2 scoops of White Flood out of my nearly-empty container, I decided to suck it up and do a round on the row machine.

Remember the "urinal rule" about using equipment? This real hot cunt completely disobeyed it and came over to "use" the one next to me. I was probably 1/4 of the way through when she arrived and when I was done, she stopped too. I grabbed the spray bottle and towel to wipe my machine down and handed it to her. A smile and thank you on her part; wink and the gun on my part. I lawled about how stupid it was for a minute right after I did it.

Let's see... umm, there is a girl in my Communication in a Global Society class that I am gonna ask out on a date Wednesday. Pretty pumped about that. I don't know what else -- I doubt anyone reads this. This is more of a log for me to keep track than it is a "regular" thread.

Not proofreading this one. I got sleeping pills to slam. Maybe I'll get up early to read the 100-something pages of this gay book for my College Writing II class tomorrow morning; you're god damn right I ain't doin' that fucking shit tonight. Honestly, it won't be read tomorrow morning. This class will just be completely silent tomorrow since I'm the only one who ever contributes to the god damn discussion when the teacher attempts to spark one.

I'm rambling. Didn't add masturbating to my cardio. Forgot. But let it be known that I did.

[ryl515]

Didn't add spreadsheet. Motherfucking cunt


Done.

[tapout]

White Flood is for pussies. Man up.

http://www.bodybuilding.com/store/drivensports/craze.html

[tapout]

I had the old Watermelon WF and it was OK. It still had Beet Root in it. The new is just garbage.

Bought a 100 serving and gave 90 servings away.

[ryl515]

White Flood is for pussies. Man up.

http://www.bodybuilding.com/store/drivensports/craze.html

Thank you very much bro.

I had White Flood a couple months ago after reading a few good reviews on it and it worked pretty well imo. I was a little shy on my "free gift with $100 purchase" deal from a1supplements so I grabbed the 100 servings since I knew it wasn't complete shit. It's tough to find a good preworkout that you haven't had personal experience with. I have had good luck with C4, Neurocore, NO Shotgun (the first time anyway), the old Superpump 250, and 1MR. After seeing some positive reviews, when I ordered the Fat Obliteration stack, I also threw in Mass Pump XXL (Powerlabs?).

[Porch Monkey]

looking @ white flood's ingredients there's not much of anything in it

[Captain Ahab]

Only place I have ever saw ANYONE vouch for white flood is bodybuilding.com forums.

[ryl515]

It got me pumped and sometimes made my legs go numb lol

[Porch Monkey]

gonna try 300mg of caffeine & 60mg of 1,3 dimeth here in a few hours, if it does nothing as it has so far, then the rest of it is going in the trash!

[ryl515]

gonna try 300mg of caffeine & 60mg of 1,3 dimeth here in a few hours, if it does nothing as it has so far, then the rest of it is going in the trash!

When in doubt, double the dose... or triple :D

My preworkout philosophy has followed this, and while I have often felt like I was going to have a heart attack from it for the rest of the day (or two), I never did. Invincibility bro; look into it.

[Porch Monkey]

no thank you, I'm beginning to believe that 1,3 dimeth is bogus, fucking worthless!

[Spider Monkey]

When in doubt, double the dose... or triple :D

My preworkout philosophy has followed this, and while I have often felt like I was going to have a heart attack from it for the rest of the day (or two), I never did. Invincibility bro; look into it.

Invincible people don't get DUIs. :fyi:

[tapout]

Thank you very much bro.

I had White Flood a couple months ago after reading a few good reviews on it and it worked pretty well imo. I was a little shy on my "free gift with $100 purchase" deal from a1supplements so I grabbed the 100 servings since I knew it wasn't complete shit. It's tough to find a good preworkout that you haven't had personal experience with. I have had good luck with C4, Neurocore, NO Shotgun (the first time anyway), the old Superpump 250, and 1MR. After seeing some positive reviews, when I ordered the Fat Obliteration stack, I also threw in Mass Pump XXL (Powerlabs?).
Craze is by far my favorite. I dont even get that PWO feeling with it. Just intense focus and drive. Followed by Nuerocore, 1MR, Lit-Up, Maximize v2, Jack3d, and several others not worth mentioning. Been on that Size On(lemon) for intra lately. Do like.
Only place I have ever saw ANYONE vouch for white flood is bodybuilding.com forums.
This. BB.com is on that Controlled Labs nutsack.
gonna try 300mg of caffeine & 60mg of 1,3 dimeth here in a few hours, if it does nothing as it has so far, then the rest of it is going in the trash!

dat der Craze is the way to go bro.

[Porch Monkey]

will purchase

[tapout]

Nutraplanet is cheaper but its not in stock and will drop ship. In Valdosta, you will get it next day from BB.com's Florida warehouse.

[ryl515]

Invincible people don't get DUIs. :fyi:

They total their car during both DUIs and come out unharmed :fyi:

[HHRLisa]

Not invincible
http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Media/Pix/gallery/2011/6/20/1308584552524/Jackass-Ryan-Dunn-007.jpg

[ryl515]

Not invincible
http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Media/Pix/gallery/2011/6/20/1308584552524/Jackass-Ryan-Dunn-007.jpg

Me. Not that goof.

Anyway -- to start this off, I saw a license plate today that was "FAP ####" lol

Let's see... went to the rec right after class, but couldn't stay long because I had to meet with my alcohol-counselor guy (lol) this afternoon. Did a 5000m row with a hot chick next to me who broke the urinal rule. Umm apparently I ate quite a bit more today. Appears to be the chicken burrito's fault since I had two of them today. They're just so fucking good; after I had the first one, I was craving another one during my entire evening class. Missed the bus after class by about 20 seconds and had to wait 30+ minutes for another to come by [they "come by every 12 minutes" my fucking ass] and I was so fucking hungry and had to piss like a fucking race horse. By the time I got back, I ran into the bathroom on the first floor of my apartment, took a nice long piss, started the Xbox, and ate a peanut butter sammich. The burrito cravings persisted and I gave in about an hour later. Oh well, fuck it. Shit didn't go overboard -- it is probably closer to the calories I "should" be consuming anyway.

Between walking to and from bus stops, all the way downtown, around downtown, back from downtown, and all over campus, I probably walked 4+ miles today. My feet and legs are more worn out than a white cop chasing a hoodrat nigger.

Once again I am not proofreading this. No one reads the retarded comments and day-by-day happenings I write about. Time to wind down and go to sleep so I can do it all over again and be rested up for my make-or-break moment with the chick in my Communication in a Global Society class.

[ryl515]

Forgot to add the spreadsheet again :facepalm:

[Captain Ahab]

I read it :fyi:

and that is a lot better on the food

[ryl515]

I don't feel like asking that cunt to get together this weekend anymore. Maybe I'll change my mind by 5:00pm when I talk to her after class (if she comes by me to talk again that is).

[Spider Monkey]

There's no urinal rule when it comes to women bro.






































Unless you're a faggot.

[tapout]

http://cdn.nextround.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/monique-gif.gif

[ryl515]

Decided not to ask that chick to go out this weekend. Had a cunt I used to bang from home ask if she could stop by tomorrow night. I declined. Uhhh ran out of White Flood and have (I think) 1 tribulus capsule left. BCAA's are still good. Oxydrene is getting uber low which is gay. Workout was pretty okay. Did wide grip cable pulldowns, reverse grip cable pulldowns, vertical row machine, and real delt flye. All were done with 12x11x10.

Cheated a little bit on my nutrition which wasn't marked down -- I have no nutrition label to go off of. I was craving something sweet and didn't want to waste another Fiber Plus bar, so I made a deal with myself. I can get some cookies if I finish my reader's log for tomorrow. I had 4 little cookie stick thingys that are the size of my pinky.

Don't know what else to say. Didn't really feel like fapping tonight but I did anyway. I don't seem to feel like doing it anymore. DH was right.

Class tomorrow morning, play NCAA Football 2012, class, workout, DONE TIL MONDAY!
MassPump XXL (or whatever it is called), OxyElite Pro, and Lean Xtreme are due to arrive tomorrow. Pretty stoked bout that duuuude. Fucking christ, I need to get to sleep. BAI

[Captain Ahab]

Decided not to ask that chick to go out this weekend. Had a cunt I used to bang from home ask if she could stop by tomorrow night. I declined. Uhhh ran out of White Flood and have (I think) 1 tribulus capsule left. BCAA's are still good. Oxydrene is getting uber low which is gay. Workout was pretty okay. Did wide grip cable pulldowns, reverse grip cable pulldowns, vertical row machine, and real delt flye. All were done with 12x11x10.

Cheated a little bit on my nutrition which wasn't marked down -- I have no nutrition label to go off of. I was craving something sweet and didn't want to waste another Fiber Plus bar, so I made a deal with myself. I can get some cookies if I finish my reader's log for tomorrow. I had 4 little cookie stick thingys that are the size of my pinky.

Don't know what else to say. Didn't really feel like fapping tonight but I did anyway. I don't seem to feel like doing it anymore. DH was right.

Class tomorrow morning, play NCAA Football 2012, class, workout, DONE TIL MONDAY!
MassPump XXL (or whatever it is called), OxyElite Pro, and Lean Xtreme are due to arrive tomorrow. Pretty stoked bout that duuuude. Fucking christ, I need to get to sleep. BAI
Diet was decent today. And I experience the same thing during a cut (turning down old fucks).

[ryl515]

GOD MOTHERFUCKING DAMNIT I SPENT ABOUT 10 FUCKING MINUTES WRITING ABOUT HOW AWESOME MY DAY AND WORKOUT WERE AND I SOMEHOW MANAGED TO ERASE THE WHOLE THING. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

[ryl515]

GOD MOTHERFUCKING DAMNIT I SPENT ABOUT 10 FUCKING MINUTES WRITING ABOUT HOW AWESOME MY DAY AND WORKOUT WERE AND I SOMEHOW MANAGED TO ERASE THE WHOLE THING. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.
I guess I'll sum it up in a less awesome way:

Biceps:
Hammers 12x11x10
Cross body curls 12x11x10
15 lb bar reverse curls 50x50x50

Elliptical was finally open so I took advantage of that. Cardio to the beat of Cradle of Filth's Nymphetamine album. Songs: Filthy Little Secret, Swansong for a Raven, Mother of Abominations, Nymphetamine, Soft White Throat, Bestial Lust, and Prey.

Bestial Lust translates to ~220 strides per minute the entire song so shit got fuckin' real during that. I'm usually to mad and/or focused while at the rec to be polite to people, but I decided to change that up because I felt so fucking good after I was done. Walking to the water fountain, I caught a hot cunt's eye. Normally I'd just shrug it off, but I decided to be nice and shoot her a half-assed grin. She totally blew me off. Like "who is this fucking retard smiling at me? I am way too hot and snobby to pay any mind."

I was in such a good mood that I didn't care in the least. Came home, got my ass fucked in the bowl game on NCAA Football 2012, started a new season, went 2-0 thus far, fapped, and now here I am. Getting up at 9:00am tomorrow to get a workout in before my grandparents come to take me out for my birthday that unfortunately occurred a couple weeks ago. After the workout, I am off to Tractor Supply to buy a 50lb bag of rabbit food for my 13+lb bunny. Gotta pick up a carton of cigarettes while I'm at it. Stop at the bank and cash a check as well. Fucking christ -- I'm never gonna go to sleep if I keep talking.

(not proofing)

BAI!

[tapout]

Not enough proteinz

[Pootie]

Not enough proteinz

This at the minimum you need 75% of your body weight.

[tapout]

This at the minimum you need 75% of your body weight.

Maybe the average person. With all the cardio he is doing, he should be at 1.5% of his BW or hes gonna lose any muscle he had. He should also be taking in BCAAs in the am and up until he starts eating at 4.

[J31Bro]

Not enough proteinz
I can help. :shifty:

[ryl515]

It felt like I never fell asleep last night, so it is basically like I took multiple power naps. I feel fine right now, but I didn't get that nice deep sleep for bildin teh musselz.

I know my diet is flawed. Part of it is my wacky schedule and part of it is my broke college student ass. As you can see, I'm eating the same handful of things every day. It's tough to buy things (especially perishables) when I am on a very limited income/month and sporadically get rides to teh walmartz from my sister who goes to graduate school classes, teaches undergraduate classes, and works 30-39 hours (<-- icwuttheydidther) each week as a manager at GAP.

I will do my best to fix this nonsense. Thank you for the feedback.

[ryl515]

Maybe the average person. With all the cardio he is doing, he should be at 1.5% of his BW or hes gonna lose any muscle he had. He should also be taking in BCAAs in the am and up until he starts eating at 4.

Oh yeah -- I take Optimum Nutrition BCAA caps before and after workouts. I need moar?

[Captain Ahab]

If you were closer I'd shoot you a fucking deer.

[tapout]

Oh yeah -- I take Optimum Nutrition BCAA caps before and after workouts. I need moar?

On my phone so im not going back to look at your schedule. You definitely need them before especially if youre training fasted. Not after. You need real food then. Take upon waking and about 4 hours later. 10g each time. Again, man up and get what you need. Nutraplanet raw BCAAs. A 500g tub is cheap.

[ryl515]

Since this is basically my blog, here's the deal:

1.) Fucking old faggot and his wrinkly ass wife pissing me off. I went to the circuit area to use the different leg machines, and right after I do seated leg presses and start doing calf raises, this old asshole bitches about "me and my wife are doing the circuit and you start on this. if you're not doing the circuit, stop now." Fuck off you stupid fucking nigger. Wait 30 fucking seconds since all I had to do was two more sets of 11 and 12 with like 5 seconds rest in between. Of course when I go to do leg extensions after seated hamstring curls, his fucking cunt wife is on it. And not only is she on it, she was carrying the spray bottle of cleaner to every station with her. Those fucking things are strategically placed all over the fucking room so everyone can access them. Don't fucking steal one of them and fuck the whole thing up. After a very unsuccessful period of attempting to do my legs, and just said fuck it and went upstairs. My legs are jacked anyway, lawl.

2.) There are four lanes on the track, people. The 4 HUGE signs clearly state that people walking are in lanes 1 and 2, while joggers and runners use lanes 3 and 4. Get your motherfucking stupid old ass out of the fucking 3rd lane walking at 0.0005 mph. Fuck your god damn spandex pants like you're some sort of 80 year old marathon athlete. Get that god damn head band off your head while you're at it. You aren't going to work up a fucking sweat walking heel to toe for a couple laps. Even the old cunts and their power-walking thing are in the 3rd and 4th lane. Just because you swing your arms a little more than all of the other old fucks doesn't mean you're breaking any speed records. Get the fucking hell out of here. Jesus fucking christ, I have to deal with old morons if I use the rec in the morning and I have to deal with wifebeater-show-off-for-the-girls-tough-guys if I use it in the evening. Fuck you Kent State and your fucking rec. I need to buy new resistance bands that don't fucking rip after 3 days and do P90X again.

3.) That fucking cunt I dropped my number to was on that fucking bike again. If you're not going to utilize the paper with my number on it, quit eye fucking me. God fucking damnit, it makes shit so uncomfortable when you can feel someone watching you.

4.) Your fart-can civic isn't cool. Stop reving the engine and flooring it when there are cunts on the sidewalk. No one is impressed other than 9th grade faggots.

I'm sure I have more. I need to go to Sheetz, Walmart, and Tractor Supply.

ps DH, venison is fucking awesome. My daddy doesn't hunt anymore, but his friends will sometimes give him a little. Haven't done it this year unless my parents are keeping it all for themselves













The moral of the story is















you can't trust the system
































maaaaan

[Porch Monkey]

3.) That fucking cunt I dropped my number to was on that fucking bike again. If you're not going to utilize the paper with my number on it, quit eye fucking me. God fucking damnit, it makes shit so uncomfortable when you can feel someone watching you.
pretty sure she thinks you're stalking her

:umad2:

[Spider Monkey]

Pix of sister?

[Captain Ahab]

This thread makes me appreciate my home gym.

[Captain Ahab]

Oh yeah.and pics of said jacked legs
No homo

[ryl515]

pretty sure she thinks you're stalking her

:umad2:

I was there first. She can wait til I'm done unless she's gonna throw that sweaty vag my way sometime.

[ryl515]

I had ~$200 left on my credit card until around the middle of February. I can get by on that, right? Wrong. Those fucking assholes over at McAfee virus scan automatically renewed my shit for $95. They must do that fucking shit on purpose because I would have dropped those niggers if I had the chance. Some website (wasn't porn) had three viruses infiltrate my system at once a while ago, so I ran the virus scan to find them and get rid of them. They showed up in the scan but when I selected them to delete them, McAfee was like "lol can't do it"

Fucking worthless piece of shit $100 virus scan. I'd be better off jacking my dick all over my laptop to remove shit.

[Spider Monkey]

LMFAO! McAfee is a joke bro.

[Captain Ahab]

Jeezus bro.

[atoz350]

LMFAO! McAfee is a joke bro.

I keep telling our IT department that. The fucking swear by it.

[ryl515]

I'm well aware that it is a joke... have been ever since it told me I had three viruses and it won't remove them. WTF? Not to mention their "real time scanning" that prevents shit before it can infiltrate.

[ryl515]

So I have the apartment to myself tonight and I felt obligated to have a sweet masturbation session. I wouldn't have normally done it because I'm not in the mood, but I felt like I had to take advantage of the opportunity. Since I wasn't really feelin' it, I really had to work to get it out. I jacked my fucking dick raw. I went in the shower to clean myself since I hadn't showered after my workout yet, and it burned so fucking bad when the water hit my dick. I dun goofd and fucked my dick up. Worst pain ev4r. Good thing I don't get laid anymore.

[Captain Ahab]

So I have the apartment to myself tonight and I felt obligated to have a sweet masturbation session. I wouldn't have normally done it because I'm not in the mood, but I felt like I had to take advantage of the opportunity. Since I wasn't really feelin' it, I really had to work to get it out. I jacked my fucking dick raw. I went in the shower to clean myself since I hadn't showered after my workout yet, and it burned so fucking bad when the water hit my dick. I dun goofd and fucked my dick up. Worst pain ev4r. Good thing I don't get laid anymore.

I got into a massive 2 or 3 day fap binge one time and did the same thing. Had parts on my dick were I rubbed it raw. It hurt.

[Captain Ahab]

Your diet should look something more like this:

http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m122/deerhunt1988/diet.jpg

Only reason I didn't eat 2200 cals is because I didn't work out.

[ryl515]

looks more like this (attached)



































tried to fap a few minutes ago because my dick seemed to be healed... i was wrong. ripped a hole in my dick wtf

[Captain Ahab]

Need more fat.

[ryl515]

DONT TELL ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE ASSHOLE

[Captain Ahab]

YOU WANT A SEXY SWOLE BODY LIKE ME OR NOT

[ryl515]

I do

[tapout]

The worst spotter in the world - YouTube

[Captain Ahab]

LOL @ him taking earrings out

LOL @ "lets go black man!"

[ryl515]

woodplow little blue shorts cunt.


ANYWAY. Calories were low, of course. Eating fail occurred during the afternoon. After an all-out-sweet-as-fuck-intense-entire-shirt-down-to-belly-button-soaked-with-sweat session on the elliptical, my shit was wrecked yo. Since I was so fucking wet with sweat, I got the chills throughout my whole body for the entire walk home. The random chills persisted even after a HOT shower (in which I ripped open the bump on my nutsack and plucked the ingrown hair out). I just wanted to sit down and slam water for hours.

Circuit was crazy as well. Some fairly-chubby-but-adorable-face cunt was doing it as well and I accidentally (really) kinda whipped her with the towel when I was wiping the preacher curl pads off after my sweaty ass was all over it and she was next. But in all fitness srzns, reps for each station were 20-30 and the stationary bikes in between were set on either C or D (out of A-E) which was accompanied by a 75ish% sprint by me. Other than the doucher that interfered with my circuit towards the end, the rec was a huge success today.

Went to walmart and got some more foodz and drinkz. Couldn't get a lot due to my credit card getting fucked up the asshole by McAfee and I was using my debit card. Hopefully bills aren't outrageous this month. Got some flavored bottled water to take to classes, vanilla soy milk (I'm not lactose intolerant -- it just tastes good), fiber plus bars (for optimal farts and shits to laugh at), sardines (healthiest food ev4r), sliced chickenz, broccoli, and uhh maybe some other stuff -- can't remember.

Ummm my giant bunny is doing well. We had a random hourish of heavy snow that showed up out of nowhere and stopped abruptly. If more is piled on, my bunny will be happy. She goes on the balcony with me and loves to play in the snow.

What else... oh yeah, after a failed attempt at jacking my dick again last night, I decided to hold off for tonight. Just watched Behind the Music: Ted Nugent.

OH FUCK. How about this for some shit: apparently I dun goofd and fucked my right knee up yesterday. I don't know how in the fuck I did it or when it happened, but I noticed it early in the evening. It was sore when I woke up today, but the pain vanished after I got my "high" from my preworkout drink. Went and did all that shit at the rec and never thought twice about it. You bet your fucking nigger ass it is killing me right now though. Fucking christ. I'm gonna be pissed if this shit stays with me tomorrow and beyond.

I don't know what else... oh, there was a smokin' hot blonde cunt on the elliptical next to me. When she was done she started to run around the track. Holy fucking hell was her ass hot. I'd eat her asshole after she had been working out for an entire day.

DH -- is your real name Jeremy Patterson? Look up the guy who is the poster boy for hydroxycut. I swear to god it's you.

Ok, I'm done. BI

[ryl515]

oh yeah got some fish oil too

[Captain Ahab]

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-E85_5mYwwds/TVVRFV2E86I/AAAAAAAAJkU/ZPKDjLWeYD4/s1600/Jeremy%2BPatterson-REPS-Alex%2BArdenti-165.jpg

hardly. lol.

He is only 5'9" though.

[ryl515]

He looks a lot different in the ads in M&B and IronMan

[ryl515]

This. His before image reminds me of you when you got fat and made that video

http://www.muscletech.com/products/hydroxycut_hardcore/images/ath_jeremy_patterson_bna.jpg

[Porch Monkey]

Half Ton Mum | World's Heaviest Woman | Channel 4 - YouTube

[ryl515]

My dad hates fat women lol

He said anyone labeled obese (or worse) should have to pay extra taxes. Actually makes sense. Quit eating all the god damn food and using everyones taxes for your fatass related healthcare.

[ryl515]

Cardio was enjoyable today.

Communication in a Global Society instructor was out so his assistant covered (easy).

Reviewed for Interpersonal Communication test. Gave us a study guide, gave us all the answers, told us only stuff on the study guide is on the test lol cool.

Got out of Interpersonal Communication early because of the review.

Went to the rec again and it was full of douchebags. Almost every piece of equipment was taken so I just did abs on the floor.

Found out the chick I was gonna ask on a date has a boyfriend.

Calories are higher with a shit load of proteenz w00t.

Played NCAA Fotball 2012 and remain undefeated this season.

Checked to see if I remembered to take my Foundations of Communication quiz. I didn't. Gotta do that tomorrow which is gay. Already wrote my readers log though. Win.

Oh, the reason I ate two Fiber Plus bars within 5 minutes was because I throw one in my backpack for in between my two classes or I die from hunger. I went to grab it outta my bag and was like "holy fucking nigger shit, I put one in here at one point and didn't eat it!" Of course I was about to die from hunger so I devoured both. Whatev.

Saw this fat chick who sent me pics of her huge boobs then I almost banged her but she had a panic attack and almost died lol. She didn't see me which is good because I've been ignoring her texts and she would probably be a lolumad at me if she could confront me. Don't need your shit, fatty.

I need to quit writing.

BAI

[Pootie]

This

[Pootie]

This thread is worthless without pics :fyi:

[DUSSIN]

This thread is worthless without pics :fyi:

.

[tapout]

.

[Captain Ahab]

Cardio was enjoyable today.

Communication in a Global Society instructor was out so his assistant covered (easy).

Reviewed for Interpersonal Communication test. Gave us a study guide, gave us all the answers, told us only stuff on the study guide is on the test lol cool.

Got out of Interpersonal Communication early because of the review.

Went to the rec again and it was full of douchebags. Almost every piece of equipment was taken so I just did abs on the floor.

Found out the chick I was gonna ask on a date has a boyfriend.

Calories are higher with a shit load of proteenz w00t.

Played NCAA Fotball 2012 and remain undefeated this season.

Checked to see if I remembered to take my Foundations of Communication quiz. I didn't. Gotta do that tomorrow which is gay. Already wrote my readers log though. Win.

Oh, the reason I ate two Fiber Plus bars within 5 minutes was because I throw one in my backpack for in between my two classes or I die from hunger. I went to grab it outta my bag and was like "holy fucking nigger shit, I put one in here at one point and didn't eat it!" Of course I was about to die from hunger so I devoured both. Whatev.

Saw this fat chick who sent me pics of her huge boobs then I almost banged her but she had a panic attack and almost died lol. She didn't see me which is good because I've been ignoring her texts and she would probably be a lolumad at me if she could confront me. Don't need your shit, fatty.

I need to quit writing.

BAI
Bout fucking time you got some proteinz. Even though if it all was shakes. lol.

Try this for a snack instead of the fiber bars.

http://www.walmart.com/ip/Premier-Nutrition-Chocolate-Peanut-Butter-High-Protein-Bar-2.5-oz/19794526

they are nomz. you can find them with all the other workout supplements next to the vitamins at wal-mart. they are like $1.17 each here. 300 cals/30g protein.

[Spider Monkey]

My dad hates fat women lol

He said anyone labeled obese (or worse) should have to pay extra taxes. Actually makes sense. Quit eating all the god damn food and using everyones taxes for your fatass related healthcare.

Your father and I would get along just fine.

[wishuponansg]

Stay in the squat rack, bro. You won't have to worry about old fogeys there.

[ryl515]

Pics are hard to get when I don't know where the camera is.
Not to mention the fact that I have no free time. If I'm not at the rec, I'm in class. If I'm not in class, I'm reading. If I'm not reading, I'm writing. If I'm not writing, I'm fapping. If I'm not fapping, I'm browsing crunktimes for lols. If I'm not browsing crunktimes for lols, I'm sleeping.

PS I stay on the second floor machines/cables/free weights which doesn't have a squat rack. All the idiot workout-in-wifebeater fegs are flooding the squat rack and bench downstairs.

PPS Speaking of not being at the rec because I'm in class, time to go to another class. Fare thee well bros.

[ryl515]

Ate some stuff I didn't check the macros on so a spreadsheet is irrelevant today.

Went to the rec this afternoon after my first class and some chick bein all up on my dick in the parking lot. At one point she was all "lol I don't have a bra on" so I checked her tits out and was all "I can't tell yo" and she moved her hipsterish sweater to the side so I could see her shirt underneath and her nipples were sticking out crazy far. I told her it gave me a boner, she loled, I said "I feel like we're gonna be makin' out real soon" and she said "probably". Did 12x10x8 of wide dumbbell presses and switch off every other set with 12x10x8 of close grip dumbbell presses. The weight of the dumbbells remained the same throughout all sets. Used 27.5's because that was the highest poundage available, but it's not easy switching between wide and close grip with no rest between the two. Mmmm, did a 2000m interval on the row machine which took like 9 min 14 sec, so it was pretty tough. Uhh... took an online quiz -- got 9/10. Already had my reader's log done for the article I had to read so I played a little NCAA '12. Went undefeated through the regular season with Kent State but lost the BCS championship to Oklahoma. Went to my other class and shared some lols with everyone. The little freshman cunts can't get enough of me. Considering asking one or a few of them to take me out to eat on their meal plan. Also considering masturbating here in a minute. Gonna drink some cookies and cream casein protein and vanilla soy milk soon and call it a night.

fyi I weighed 196.8 lbs this morning. Probably woulda weighed like 190 lbs if I got all the epic farts out prior to weighing myself. Thank you Fiber Plus bars from the day before -- couldn't fall asleep because I kept farting and loling, was probably farting up a storm in my sleep (good thing chicks don't sleep with me anymore), and then unloaded a Nazi gas chamber of farts in the bathroom this morning. I was gonna write something else but I forgot.

BAI

[Pop Da Hatch]

you skinny yet bro?

[Porch Monkey]

video games interrupt

[ryl515]

I know what I forgot to say.

Chest workout was this:

- Wide grip chest presses and Close grip chest presses (alternating) 12x10x8
- Cable flyes using the "5" plate out of "15" 12x10x8
- Pushups (standard, wide, diamond, decline) all one set of 10

Presses were done with no rest between WG and CG but 10 seconds between sets

Cable flyes were done with enough rest to laugh at myself (a reoccurring theme in my lifts)

Pushups were done with 10 second rests between different sets

If you think I'm a vag for using <30 lbs on presses, only 1/3 of the stack on the cables, and only 10 pushups for each style, fuck off. Zyzz (RIP brah), Dave Hawk, trainers in IronMan mag, and your moms all said it's FORM over WEIGHT. And my form was good niggaaazzz.



Chest is sore this morning which is always awesome since you feel like shit destroying a workout and feeling fine the next day. Oh, fyi, didn't fap last night. I used to wake up at like noon -- cut that back to 10 for a while, 9:30 for a week, 9:00 for 2 weeks, and now 8:30. I'm trying to get on the schedule of a normal human being which also gives me more time at the gym. Had to get to sleep so I didn't fap (and I wasn't feeling it anyway, no need to rip my dick open again). Didn't get to sleep early enough so hopefully that is adjusted tonight.

[ryl515]

you skinny yet bro?

Don't wanna be "skinny".
Wanna be ripped up like DH so I don't look like a fool when we get together to smash cunts in.

[ryl515]

Lawl apparently wasn't hungry today.

Umm the "Track (interval) 2 laps" was sprinting straights and walking curves. 5000m interval row was fucking awesome. Switched from being "IM MAD AND IT FIRES ME UP TO KICK ASS IN THE GYM" to "I feel good man, lets do some cool shit." Either method works fine, I was just in a techno mood rather than Cradle of Filth. The 5000m interval was all out 100m, take it easy 100m, all out 100m, and so on. Got really pumped and did like 500m all out at one point. Also went all out for the last few hundred meters just to go out with a bang.

Biceps were worked this morning and then again at night. I never get a good biceps workout in. No matter what kind of weight, amount of reps, speed of sets, rest in between. They just don't like to respond anymore. I'm trying to purposely overtrain them to shock those motherfuckers back into knowing their god damn role. My chest is pretty sore today and I love it. I miss having that feeling in my bi's. I miss not being able to straighten my arm for 2 days because it hurts to stretch the muscle.

Umm hard nipple girl told me yesterday that she wanted to go to the rec with me tonight since both of our last classes end at 6:45pm today. I had a test so I knew I'd be out early which she said was ok because she always gets out early too. She never got ahold of me to go though. If she was waiting on me to ask her if she is still coming since these cunts are used to having dudes drool all over their shit, then that's that. She can find some other feg to suck her dick.

It was a really nice day today, actually fairly hot during the afternoon. Who the fuck would expect that in NE Ohio on February 1st? I was pretty warm so I threw on a deep-v (dont h8) and some flip flops to boot. Holy fuckin' hell. When I got out of class and the sun was down, it hit me that I made a big fucking mistake. Feet are cold as fuck. Hard nipples poking through my shirt (lol). Just freezing my dick off standing at the student center waiting on the fucking bus. I saw this hot cunt in the corner of my eye who kept looking over at me. When I noticed she was doing it again, I turned my head to look at her for that "I CAUGHT YOU! AWKWAAAARD" moment. And catch her I did. She did the whole "look at the ground really fast" deal. Lolled.

Umm haven't masturbated for a few days and that's usually awesome because I'd do it tonight or something and just blow a load through my ceiling. However, what began as holding off on masturbation because I ripped my dick open has turned into just not feeling like doing it. Chicks don't touch my dick and I don't touch it either. Don't even bother fixin' my pubes up anymore since I know I have no one to impress. Well, I usually do it anyway even in a dry spell because I feel "dirty" if I don't. Not now. I'm gonna go with the afro dick that no one pays attention to. My dick is probably real pissed. Fuck that guy anyway. Always being all small and shit when chicks see him.

I'm done. BAI

[ryl515]

Epic shirt attached.


That's me with my retarded blue-black hair. Starting to fade though. Not shiny right now :(


Umadbro?

[Porch Monkey]

matches the emo hair

[Spider Monkey]

Is your last name Stallone?

[wishuponansg]

Whats up with your routine? Seems like you're all over the place.

[ryl515]

lol @ emo hair.

My routine is all over hell because of being 23 and finally realizing I want to get the fuck out of school. Also due in part to the "breaks" I have between classes and sleep that I use for working out are often interfered with by sleeveless shirt fegs who overload the rec center. Right now was not the best time to realize I want to get back into my fooseball playin' shape.

P90X was one of the best investments I ever made. However, not being able to afford a set of dumbbells lead to me needing to use resistance bands. I ripped those motherfuckers in a matter of weeks... bought a new set... same deal. I actually just did the Core Synergistics dvd because on the few exercises you need weights with, bands work really well, and I only have one that isn't completely torn apart.



If I redo my ghey hair and it is shiny and blue again, I'll take a pic-chur just for yew guise.


Time to read and write some nonsense out for class tonight. BAI

[wishuponansg]

Just go squat, bench and deadlift bro. Fuck all that machine shit.

[ryl515]

Calories were randomly high today. Didn't eat too often but when I did it was more calories at a time than usual. Dunno. Whatev -- I was up earlier than usual and was all "MUFFIN4BREAKFAST!" and shit. The wrap was actually a significantly lower amount of calories though since the amount of rice was probably 1/3 of what I had calculated into that total. Chicken was a couple slices of lunchmeat type chcken since I ran out of the good stuff, cheese was eliminated, and salsa was replaced by a packet of Taco Bell mild sauce.

Drank my preworkout and was about to go to the gym when I thought "ya know... it's always chest-back-shoulders-arms-legs... let's bust out that core shit." Grabbed my P90X Core Synergistics DVD and got to work. I still have my lightest resistance band which is perfect for that workout because there is never a point where you use heavy weights. 90% of it is pure bodyweight anyway. It is pretty tough and he has you going at breakneck speed half the time, so I counted it as cardio since I was short of breath and sweatin' my fucking dick off (OxyElite Pro probably factored into that lawl). The "nb" following P90X in spreadsheet means "no bonus". With 9ish minutes left, he says some shit like "time for the bonus round. stop here or keep going with us" and I usually (back when I did this a lot) say "FUCK YEAH TONY LET'S GO" and do it, but I had to read a journal article, watch two videos, take a quiz, and prepare a reader's log that all needed to be done by 7:00 pm. Got it all done and skipped the videos. Owned the questions on the quiz about the reading, guessed on the questions about the video, got 9/10 lol.

My bunny is doing great. She was 12.5 lbs when we saw the vet a month ago. I wish I could pick her up and find a way to have her sit still on the scale so I can see what the current weight is, because I'm sure it is higher. It's hard to pick up a huge bunny who desperately tries to escape your grasp. Big strong legs -> big strong feet -> claws -> big painful scratch(es) on my hands, wrist, and arms. She always seemed to slice my wrists. I'm assuming she wants to kill me or is giving me a hint?

My Foundations of Communication instructor was telling some other students in my class about how I have a good writing style. WIN! Some other dude is zoning in on the freshman cunts I was gonna woo in order to receive free food from their meal plans. Oh well.

Felt odd masturbating again tonight. A nightly routine turned into a special event, so I wasn't used to it. The first squirt was crazy and somehow managed to squirt up and in all directions lol.






Fin.

[The Unit]

Bunny in box, box on scale..

[ryl515]

Bunny in box, box on scale..

I know, the breeder had a scale with a basket fastened to it. I just don't attempt to straight pick her up these days because she is very independent with her "I'm sexually mature and not spayed" attitude. Very loving still. We were just on the balcony and I laid down on my stomach and she hopped over and gave me kisses :D

[ryl515]

Bunny pics from December 2011

[Spider Monkey]

I had a Havana Blue that looked just like her when I was a child. Fuck holding them. That's suicide.

[Porch Monkey]

I'd be afraid it'd bite the shit out of me then I'd have Easter dinner.

[Spider Monkey]

Rabbits don't bite bro. Their weapons are their hind legs.

[Porch Monkey]

then I'd have some nice lucky rabbit's feet keychains

[ryl515]

Rabbits don't bite bro. Their weapons are their hind legs.

Indeed. I have a couple scars on my forearm from attempting to pick up a struggling bunny lol. However, I also have a scar on my finger from a rabbit bite. My sisters rabbit always grunts and charges me but never actually attacks. One day I was all "I bet you wouldn't do shit brah. I wouldn't even need to pull my hand back in fear." Yeah... mistakes were made that day.

ps I can imagine everyone thinking she would bite and destroy me. But all she wants to do is be loved upon. She extends her head for head rubs, cheek rubs, and even under her chin. Rabbits are usually very protective of their chin, but not her -- apparently she has 100% trust in me. We go nose to nose for bunny kisses almost daily.


On topic -- just got back from the rec and it was fairly successful I guess. Couldn't stay as long as I would have (since I have the whole day off today) because I gotta hit the bank, sheetz, and walmart.

[The Unit]

Rabbits don't bite bro. Their weapons are their hind legs.

The fuck you talking about? I had a rabbit for one day when I was a kid, it was full size and it bit the ever-living shit out of me. Turned that fucker loose I did...

[ryl515]

The fuck you talking about? I had a rabbit for one day when I was a kid, it was full size and it bit the ever-living shit out of me. Turned that fucker loose I did...

House rabbits are helpless in the wild. You killed your rabbit :(

[Captain Ahab]

Yup, coyote/bobcat/owl/hawk/dog food.

[ryl515]

Random high calorie day.

FYI my shoulders are pussy because I dun goofd my left shoulder up in football and I guess my right one decided to be a cunt about it too. I was taking a dump reading an Iron Man magazine today and saw an article about getting awesome legs which compelled me to go back to the rec in the evening to do that. I walk in and there is a fucking dude sitting on each machine I wanted to use. Not using it. Sitting. I waited. Nope. Still sitting. Got pissed and went to the row machine. 2 on 1 off means I went all out for 200m, took it easy 100m, all out 200m, and so on. Figured I'd do a little more since a leg night was already fucked in the ass so I did a hand bike sprint interval. God fucking damnit man. People underestimate the fuck out of that hand bike. Not to mention "Kim" by Eminem came on my ipod while I was doing it. Shit got real as fuck

I need to get to sleep soon. I stayed up later than usual last night and slept through my alarm until 9:09am.

[The Unit]

House rabbits are helpless in the wild. You killed your rabbit :(

God willing!

[SAD]

Rabbit needs pancake.

[ryl515]

I'm gonna leave this attachment right here.

BAI

[ryl515]

woke up fat.
did 50 minute hardcore interval elliptical.
played ncaa football.
went to the library.
attempted to write a 4 page paper.
writers block at 2.
went back to the rec.
did another 50 minute hardcore interval elliptical session.
came back.
went undefeated with kent state on ncaa football.
lost bcs bowl to notre dame.
second time i went undefeated and lost the bcs bowl.
was cold.
took a hot shower.
need to finish paper tomorrow.

[Captain Ahab]

your diet is all sorts of fucked up :fyi:

[Spider Monkey]

The fuck you talking about? I had a rabbit for one day when I was a kid, it was full size and it bit the ever-living shit out of me. Turned that fucker loose I did...

You had a retarded rabbit. :wat:

[ryl515]

your diet is all sorts of fucked up :fyi:

I know.

[The Unit]

You had a retarded rabbit. :wat:

I just thought it had a bad attitude, one things for sure. On that day, Mr.Rabbit learned a valuable lesson on consequences and accountability....

[ryl515]

Had a sweet fucking workout this afternoon. Fuck yeah. I felt so good that I almost decided to not take my afternoon bipolar medication when I got back (lol true story). Went like this:

Chest press- 70x15, 82.5x12, 90x10, 102.5x8, 115x6, 127.5x4, 140x2 (long negatives), 152.5x1 (long negative).

Cable rows- I forgot numbers but it was failed at 4 and I got mad.

Dumbbell bench press- 15x12x10x8x4x2 all with 27.5 lbs in each hand.

Wide grip lat pulldowns- 25x15, 37.5x12, 50x10, 62.5x8, 75x6, 87.5x4, 100x2 (long negatives), 125x1 (long negative).

Close grip dumbbell bench press- 22.5x15, 22.5x12, 25x10, 25x8, 27.5x6, 27.5x4, 27.5x2 (long negatives).

Underhand lat pulldowns- 25x15, 37.5x12, 50x10, 62.5x8, 75x6, 87.5x4, 100x2 (long negatives), 125x1 (long negative).

Cable crossovers- 1x15, 2x12, 3x10, 4x8, 5x6, 6x4, 7x2 (long negatives), 8x1 (long negative). [the plates are 1-15]

Back extensions- BW + extend arms x 15, same x 12, same x 10, extend 6lb med ball x 8, extend 8lb med ball x 6, extend 12lb med ball x 4, extend 12lb ball x 2. (these are extremely rough since I broke my lower back in 2008).

Diamond pushups- 15x12x10x8x6x4x2 (almost asked a cunt to sit on my back but I was too shy and gay).

Under the fence pushups- x10.


All followed by 2000m steady row machine.
Shit got fuckin' real.


OH BY THE WAY, NEED YOUR OPINION:
So, I'm over the "I have light brown eyebrows and gay blue-black hair" thing and I want it to grow out so I can get my normal hair back. I'm tired of how my neckline and sideburns get uber curly when they're longer too. While I'm waiting, since I already look gay, I figured I'd gay it up a little more and sport a mohawk for a bit until my normal hair comes back and I can get a haircut.
Yea or nay?

[Spider Monkey]

Do it.




Also, holy fuck you must spend a shit ton of time at the gym getting all of those reps out.

Oh, you forgot your spreadsheet again. lol

[Porch Monkey]

shave it all off

[Captain Ahab]

Holy shit, your workout actually made sense!

[brynm]

shave it all off

Including eyebrows.

[ryl515]

shave it all off

I look ghey as fuark with really short hair. The usual cut is one inch on top, 3/8 on the sides, tapered high, sideburns as long as possible before getting thinner (my sideburns grow to a point wtf). Yes, I do know all of that.

Including eyebrows.

My eyebrows are weird in the fact that they are medium brown at the end closer to my nose and get lighter and lighter as they extend across my face until they are almost blonde on the tips. I was one of those bleach-blonde-lookin-fag-children. Don't know how my hair magically changed from light blonde to brown. Or when for that matter.










I guess I'm gonna do it. Gotta wait for teh sister to get back from work to do the honors. Gotta figure out how thick to make the hawk too. Don't want it too thick, don't want it too fat.

[Spider Monkey]

My hair turns kinda blond in the summer. :wat:

[ryl515]

Holy shit, your workout actually made sense!

I got it from an article in Iron Man. Not necessarily the exercises themselves, but the sets/reps. Rest in between sets was very minimal. I had also taken two OxyElite Pro's prior to the gym -- so between being go-go-go and the thermogenic, I was sweating my dick off. My chest blew up like a balloon today. It just exploded and chicks were mirin'.

[ryl515]

My hair turns kinda blond in the summer. :wat:

You been usin' that Sun-In nigga?

[Spider Monkey]

You been usin' that Sun-In nigga?

Naw bro. It happens naturally from spending every weekend in the pool. Same with my beard and eyebrows and shit bro.

[ryl515]

It's official.

I have been hawked.

[Captain Ahab]

pics MEOW

[HHRLisa]

pics MEOW

this :icon14:

[Z-28]

this :icon14:

http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/5368_124258451553_762511553_3159763_3750915_n.jpg

[HHRLisa]

http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/5368_124258451553_762511553_3159763_3750915_n.jpg

Aww did you find that on my fb???:grin3:

[ryl515]

HAWK:yumyum:

[Z-28]

3rd row down, 6th to the right.


https://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=lisa+pardo&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=467l2340l0l3388l10l9l0l0l0l0l1191l2888l2.3.2.5-1.0.1l9l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&biw=1280&bih=648&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=6hIyT8OTB5OKsALN1IygBw

[HHRLisa]

HAWK:yumyum:
Doesn't look like you

3rd row down, 6th to the right.


https://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=lisa+pardo&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=467l2340l0l3388l10l9l0l0l0l0l1191l2888l2.3.2.5-1.0.1l9l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&biw=1280&bih=648&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=6hIyT8OTB5OKsALN1IygBw

hmm interesting my third row down 6th to the right is

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-7pfDDZSEmfs/AAAAAAAAAAI/AAAAAAAAAAA/Ryto6HsUEQw/photo.jpg

[Z-28]

my ass. That is the 5th.

[HHRLisa]

my ass. That is the 5th.

Uh bro...

http://crunktimes.com/ct/ctpix/14674f3214a211d55.jpg

[Z-28]

ohhhh.

[tapout]

lollittlescreens. Shes on my second row.

[HHRLisa]

lollittlescreens. Shes on my second row.

How does that make you feel?

[tapout]

Rock hard

[ryl515]

I searched my name. It's a picture of me pretending to eat the head of my cousin's daughter. I won't post it here because for some reason my cell phone number is on it too. wtf

[ryl515]

Oh, the real reason I came here:

Both chest and back are sore as FUARK this morning. I love it.

[HHRLisa]

Rock hard

Hot.

[ryl515]

Have an appointment with my alcohol-dui-related counselor at 4:00pm so I wanted to squeeze in a quick workout. Of course, if I am short on time and can only pick one body part, you bet your cunt it's chest. Here we go:

Chest press: 75x15, 82.5x12, 95x10, 107.5x8, 120x6, 132.5x4, 145x2, 157.5x1, 170x1, 182.5x1, 195x1, 207.5x1, 220xfail (any sets of 4,2, or 1 = long negatives)

Cable crossovers: 1x15, 2x12, 3x10, 4x8, 5x6, 6x4, 7x2, 8x1, faggots crowding my shit so I stop (4,2,1 = long negatives)

Old gay press machine: 100x15, 115x12, 130x10, 145x8, 160x6, 175x4, 190x2, 205x1, 220xfail (4,2,1 = long negatives)

Fly machine: 100x15, 115x12, 130x10, 145x8, 160x6, 175x4, 190xfail+pissed+leave (4 = long negative)

Some chick in my class is always checkin' my shit out but, unfortunately, due to my 0/2 fail on thursday night, no action will be taken.

Fucking christ (:jesus:), I'm such a faggot these days.
I just want to get out of school, get a shitty studio apartment, and use monies for a sweet fuckin car. Looks like I won't be bringing chicks back to my place to bang, so I may as well look like a baller on the streets.

Should probably quit wasting monies on workout nonsense and give up on that too since apparently I'm doomed to a life of looking soft. Chicks don't want a fatty with a little dick.

I'm done. bi.

[Spider Monkey]

What happened Thursday/

[Captain Ahab]

You are turning bi?

[ryl515]

Some cunt who gave me her number and said she wanted to get together suddenly "has a boyfriend" on thursday. Either she does and her signals were all fucked, or it was an excuse due to changing her mind. I'm guessing the latter.

Also thursday, some cunt who said I was "adorable" and "gorgeous" on wednesday and said she would get together over the weekend randomly tells me she calls everyone "adorable" because she's a nice person.

No, I'm not turning bi. I'm thinking asexual is the way to go.
I'm just not as cool as I used to be I guess. Used to snap my fingers at chicks and their clothes were off. I quit. :heartbreak:

[Spider Monkey]

Bro, it is the mohawk that is turnign them away.

[ryl515]

Bro, it is the mohawk that is turnign them away.

That cunt said I was adorable because of the mohawk. Made me realize all the cunts who said they liked it probably didn't. Got rid of that shit on friday and now I look like DH (only not as jacked)

[Captain Ahab]

when you look like me, you can just walk around with your shirt off and pull bitches. and then your intense lack of game and keep them away. it is a sick world bro.

[ryl515]

Terrible shoulders/triceps day.

Gonna go rip my head off. bbl

[ryl515]

Went to Walmart:

(what I remember)
Steak
tuurkey burgers
Chicken
Burrito wraps
Shredded fat reduced cheddar
Greek yogurt
Skim milk
Special K cracker chips
Fiber Plus bars
Whey protein to hold me over until my order for new whey/casein is shipped
Value pack Colossial 100 meal replacement bars
Bottled water
Crisp snap peas (or whatever they're called)

Pumped for one of the cuts of steak tomorrow or this weekend (whenever I get around to it)

[mauii]

I'm 35 pounds up from my freshman year. I'm only a sophomore.

Fuck. I'm still by no means fat, but I gotta fix this before that happens. And so I don't die in a fire.

[SAD]

I'm 35 pounds up from my freshman year. I'm only a sophomore.

Fuck. I'm still by no means fat, but I gotta fix this before that happens. And so I don't die in a fire.

35 lbs in a year? Jezus Christ you're going to be a fat fuck.

I don't even weigh 20 lbs more than I did 25 years ago.

[mauii]

35 lbs in a year? Jezus Christ you're going to be a fat fuck.

I don't even weigh 20 lbs more than I did 25 years ago.
College food, and absurd amounts of alcohol will do that. I can usually drink for days and not get sick...so its not unusual to kill a few bottles or a 30 pack in a weekend.

Granted, I only weighed around 135-140 freshman year. Now I'm 168-173 depending which side of a shit I'm on.

[Spider Monkey]

I'm 35 pounds up from my freshman year. I'm only a sophomore.

Fuck. I'm still by no means fat, but I gotta fix this before that happens. And so I don't die in a fire.
You're reverting back to your chubby childhood. Better get a grip bro.
College food, and absurd amounts of alcohol will do that. I can usually drink for days and not get sick...so its not unusual to kill a few bottles or a 30 pack in a weekend.

You can't use that as an excuse bro.

[SAD]

College food, and absurd amounts of alcohol will do that. I can usually drink for days and not get sick...so its not unusual to kill a few bottles or a 30 pack in a weekend.

Granted, I only weighed around 135-140 freshman year. Now I'm 168-173 depending which side of a shit I'm on.

Yeah. I see your point. I've never eaten any college (i.e. fatty/fast/unhealthy) foods or consumed massive amounts of alcohol.

[mauii]

You can't use that as an excuse bro.
Its not an excuse, its a reason.

[Spider Monkey]

Its not an excuse, its a reason.

No it isn't. I've been doing that as long as you've been alive and I'm not fat bro.

[SAD]

No it isn't. I've been doing that as long as you've been alive and I'm not fat bro.

^ this is true for me as well

[mauii]

No it isn't. I've been doing that as long as you've been alive and I'm not fat bro.
So copious amounts of alcohol, as well as shitty college food coupled with a lack of exercise aren't contributing factors to weight gain?

Cool bro.

[Spider Monkey]

So copious amounts of alcohol, as well as shitty college food coupled with a lack of exercise aren't contributing factors to weight gain?

Cool bro.

Correct. Your lack of exercise is doing it.

And I didn't debate the food. I was just sticking up for my booze.

[Spider Monkey]

Stop eating like a faggot, and take a walk every once in a while.

[mauii]

Stop eating like a faggot, and take a walk every once in a while.
Totally agree. I walk about an hour a day to and from classes. Which is much less than running fire calls on the daily. Which is probably why I gained so quickly. The food situation is more complicated because I'm locked into my schools shitty meal plan for a few more months.

[Spider Monkey]

Totally agree. I walk about an hour a day to and from classes. Which is much less than running fire calls on the daily. Which is probably why I gained so quickly. The food situation is more complicated because I'm locked into my schools shitty meal plan for a few more months.

Yea what about your volunteer fire fighting shit? That should be keeping you in herra shape.

And don't worry. The government will step in and control what you eat at school shortly.

[SAD]

SM, he has defective genes. Not everyone can be like us. :shrug:

[Spider Monkey]

SM, he has defective genes. Not everyone can be like us. :shrug:

Wait, did he start talking about wanting to be dead sexy and I missed it?

[mauii]

Yea what about your volunteer fire fighting shit? That should be keeping you in herra shape.

And don't worry. The government will step in and control what you eat at school shortly.
It does when I'm home. I don't do it at school.

[Spider Monkey]

You need to supplement your school routine with something similar bro.

[Captain Ahab]

So copious amounts of alcohol, as well as shitty college food coupled with a lack of exercise aren't contributing factors to weight gain?

Cool bro.

If you would have been hitting the weights you could have put on plenty of muscle during this time. Sucks for you!

[SAD]

Wait, did he start talking about wanting to be dead sexy and I missed it?

Dead sexy? Nope. He wants something much more easily obtainable, yet failed. Being dead sexy simply isn't an option.

[ryl515]

I'm 35 pounds up from my freshman year. I'm only a sophomore.

I'm still by no means fat

This is a false statement. 35 pounds in 1 year = you getting fat. I bet you're the guy who wears sweatpants to class every day and doesn't realize he is a lot fatter because they stretch. Stop being in denial you fat cunt. You should come to Kent and hook up with the fat cunt I made angry tonight:

This dude told this other dude he looked jewish and I said "look how small his nose is. He can't be jewish without that big jew nose". And this cunt was all "WHO SAID THAT ABOUT A JEW NOSE" and I admitted to it. I asked if she was jewish and offended. She says "well duh you idiot" to which I responded "laugh out loud". She says "I feel bad for those freshman girls you're having sex with because you're an asshole" and I say "I'm not currently having sex with any freshman girls" and she says "good, I'm proud of my class". I said "laugh out loud, you mad brah?" and she says "NO I'M NOT FUCKING MAD!" (as mad-sounding as anyone has ever sounded since the age of dinosaurs).

*yes I do say "laugh out loud" sometimes

lollerskates storytime over.

[Pop Da Hatch]

you trolled the shit out of that hose beast bro.

[Pop Da Hatch]

:hi5:

[JimJ]

Jesus, I haven't gained 35 pounds since I can remember.

[Captain Ahab]

This is a false statement. 35 pounds in 1 year = you getting fat. I bet you're the guy who wears sweatpants to class every day and doesn't realize he is a lot fatter because they stretch. Stop being in denial you fat cunt. You should come to Kent and hook up with the fat cunt I made angry tonight:

This dude told this other dude he looked jewish and I said "look how small his nose is. He can't be jewish without that big jew nose". And this cunt was all "WHO SAID THAT ABOUT A JEW NOSE" and I admitted to it. I asked if she was jewish and offended. She says "well duh you idiot" to which I responded "laugh out loud". She says "I feel bad for those freshman girls you're having sex with because you're an asshole" and I say "I'm not currently having sex with any freshman girls" and she says "good, I'm proud of my class". I said "laugh out loud, you mad brah?" and she says "NO I'M NOT FUCKING MAD!" (as mad-sounding as anyone has ever sounded since the age of dinosaurs).

*yes I do say "laugh out loud" sometimes

lollerskates storytime over.

If your stories are true, we would have some epic times. And more than likely get our ass kicked. :fyi:

Jesus, I haven't gained 35 pounds since I can remember.

I even have him beat, went from175lbs in August '09 to 200lbs in Jan '10 to 222 lbs in August '10. So close to 50lbs in a year.

but.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gyLR4NfMiI

you just gotta


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5p5m8P9Vscg

[ryl515]

I was a lean, ripped little cunt at 150lbs in May 2008. Then I totalled my car and spent most of the summer in rehab where they forced me to eat all day. If I didn't finish what was on my tray, they wouldn't let me go back to my room until I did. Shit was ghey... 20 lbs by July 3rd.





ps my stories are true. I'm a little ball of controversy

[mauii]

If you would have been hitting the weights you could have put on plenty of muscle during this time. Sucks for you!
Right bro? I was doing kettle bell swings throughout, so there might be something left when I cut.

[jip]

I just want to get out of school, get a shitty studio apartment, and use monies for a sweet fuckin car.

Should probably quit wasting monies on workout nonsense and give up on that too since apparently I'm doomed to a life of looking soft.

You can work out and lose weight for almost free.

Buy a pair of shoes. Start running. That's about $100 for 6 months of running if you do about 20km / week. If you run that much, I fucking guarantee that you'll be slim in 6 months.

Oh, and you'll get pussy just by running by, sweaty and in great shape, and just smiling and running on.

That cunt said I was adorable because of the mohawk.

If a woman calls you adorable or uses any synonym for cute, she is putting you in the same category as her cat and her gay best friend.


I'm 35 pounds up from my freshman year. I'm only a sophomore.

Fuck. I'm still by no means fat, but I gotta fix this before that happens. And so I don't die in a fire.

Fatty.

[mauii]

Fatty.
Yep. Starting to feel like shit. Time to fix.


3km runs 4x times per week
Kettle bell swings 3x per week
Drinks limited to coffee, water, tea, and milk for protein shakes.
Small diet changes like cutting chips/fries/sugar, but my hands are a little tied with my school meal plan.

My current weight is 170, trying to cut to 155 before I start lifting to gain a bit.

I'm thinking it takes 4 weeks.

Current Picture:
http://i.imgur.com/fwDsS.jpg

[Pop Da Hatch]

your pants are falling off.

[mauii]

your pants are falling off.
CAUSE IM A GANGSTER

[Captain Ahab]

Yep. Starting to feel like shit. Time to fix.


3km runs 4x times per week
Kettle bell swings 3x per week
Drinks limited to coffee, water, tea, and milk for protein shakes.
Small diet changes like cutting chips/fries/sugar, but my hands are a little tied with my school meal plan.

My current weight is 170, trying to cut to 155 before I start lifting to gain a bit.

I'm thinking it takes 4 weeks.

Current Picture:
http://i.imgur.com/fwDsS.jpg
I'm thinking 7-8 weeks.

[mauii]

I'm thinking 7-8 weeks.
Maybe. We'll see though.

[SAD]

CAUSE IM A GANGSTER

...With a dirty mirror.

[mauii]

...With a dirty mirror.
I live in a frathouse.

http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/422483_10150507244891697_665026696_9264965_71717364_n.jpg

[SAD]

The epitome of filth.

[mauii]

The epitome of filth.
Its pretty bad, but no where near the worst I've seen.

[ryl515]

Drink protein shakes with water. No sense in adding extra calories into your fat nigger ass. The only time I use milk in a shake [these days] is with my bedtime casein shake since (correct me if I'm wrong, fitness bros) milk is a slow digesting protein as well.

[mauii]

Drink protein shakes with water. No sense in adding extra calories into your fat nigger ass. The only time I use milk in a shake [these days] is with my bedtime casein shake since (correct me if I'm wrong, fitness bros) milk is a slow digesting protein as well.

Fuck that. Water+Protein is gross diarrhea water. I only like skim milk anyway, the added calories really aren't significant.

[jip]

Yep. Starting to feel like shit. Time to fix.


3km runs 4x times per week
Kettle bell swings 3x per week
Drinks limited to coffee, water, tea, and milk for protein shakes.
Small diet changes like cutting chips/fries/sugar, but my hands are a little tied with my school meal plan.

My current weight is 170, trying to cut to 155 before I start lifting to gain a bit.

I'm thinking it takes 4 weeks.


New pic required March 24.

[HHRLisa]

CAUSE IM A GANGSTER

http://www.mileanhour.com/files/2010/3/gangsterslooklikethis.jpg

[Pootie]

Fuck that. Water+Protein is gross diarrhea water. I only like skim milk anyway, the added calories really aren't significant.

Try almond milk unsweetened with the brotiens that shit is the jam. Less calories and full of other good for you shit

[mauii]

Try almond milk unsweetened with the brotiens that shit is the jam. Less calories and full of other good for you shit
I fucking love almond milk. Its delicious. No protein though.

[mauii]

New pic required March 24.
Deal.

Last god awful meal:

http://i.imgur.com/HIZsZ.jpg

[mauii]

Ran today. Got shinsplints like a motherfucker, as usual :emo:

[Spider Monkey]

Ran today. Got shinsplints like a motherfucker, as usual :emo:

Stop running on hard surfaces. Run on grass.

[Porch Monkey]

try walking on water

[mauii]

Stop running on hard surfaces. Run on grass.
Yea...I was running on a track. Will move to treadmill until it gets better.

[Spider Monkey]

Yea...I was running on a track. Will move to treadmill until it gets better.

A treadmill is a hard surface. Is there grass inside the track, like a football field? If so, run on that.

[mauii]

A treadmill is a hard surface. Is there grass inside the track, like a football field? If so, run on that.
Nah, indoor track. A treadmill has much more give than a track, though.

[ryl515]

Almond milk and soy milk are awesomesauce. It is, however, unforunate that 1/2 gallon of almond or soy is double the price of 1 gallon of skim.

I grew up on skim and that's my shit, yo. Niggaz always be like "IT'S LIKE DRINKING WATER" and I say "Nigga please, it's milk brah"






















































































Then I masturbate and call it a day.

[Captain Ahab]

I am in the same boat. I do not like whole milk, except in my coffee. Always bought skim UNTIL I tried Silk soy milk. Freaking love the soy milk!

[Spider Monkey]

Milk comes from cows, not beans bros.

[mauii]

I am in the same boat. I do not like whole milk, except in my coffee. Always bought skim UNTIL I tried Silk soy milk. Freaking love the soy milk!
I hear soy can fuck with your estrogen levels.

I dont like it anyway, almond milk ftw.

[Captain Ahab]

I hear soy can fuck with your estrogen levels.


Duh.Haven't you seen my man boobs?

[ryl515]

Chocolate Silk is win in a carton.

[ryl515]

Okay time for an update now that we're done talking about that fat cunt on a campus diet:

-188.8 lbs this morning
-Did my back at the rec: Underhand machine rows, wide grip cable pulldowns, one arm dumbbell rows, cable rows with rope, 20 chin-ups to finish off. All sets were done 10 slow, 10 slow, 10 fast, 20 fast using one amount of weight the entire time. (a variation of a plan in Iron Man magazine)
-15 minutes on handbike (workload): Start at 30 watts, increase by 5 every minute
-66 minutes Elliptical (weight loss interval - 4 minutes (level 4 crossramp + level 1 resistance), 4 minutes (level 10 crossramp + level 8 resistance), repeat until 28 minutes + 5 minute cool down. (did that twice)
-Took an epic nap around 4:00pm because I have been going to sleep around 2am for some reason and waking up around 7am or 8am.
-Myofusion Probiotic Cinnamonroll is the best tasting protein evar
-Tilapia + garlic peppered steak + mixed vegetables for dinner (you jelly?)

Beginning my two weeks of 25g carbs or less today, as followed by:
http://stronglifts.com/anabolic-diet-101-the-definite-anabolic-diet-guide/

Been masturbating many nights in a row lately and it's kinda burning me out. It is starting to become one of those "I don't feel like doing it but it's just my routine" things again.

[ryl515]

Actually I forgot that I was editing that diet. My only carbs will come from a protein or fiber bar and some milk in my casein shake at night. I have a protein bar for breakfast tuesday and thursday mornings and a bar in between my 3:45pm and 5:40pm classes on monday and wednesday. With a single bar and some milk being the only source of carbs for the day, I will keep it under a maximum of 50g, which will be easy. A lot lower than what I've been doing. I'm assuming carbs will be roughly 30g-40g per day; I just haven't looked at the macros yet.

Oh, and as awesome tasting as Optimum Nutrition powders are, their French Vanilla Natural casein tastes like shit. The 1-2g difference in some of the macros are not worth the "natural" healthy looking factor.

[ryl515]

Net carbs were too high yesterday. Half a protein bar for breakfast this morning and saving milk for high carb days. I'm gonna have to be slamming milk all day on my high carbs days because I bought three gallons on friday. Don't want that shit to go bad and have to waste it. Poor college faggots need to conserve as much food as possible. Any carbs will come from vegetables that are also high in fiber which = low net carbs.

Bye.